Innovative Techniques in Marketing-1

Wed, 22 Apr 2009 06:11:29 GMT

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Luscious strawberries!!Grape bunches galore promising heaven on the Taste buds!!

All available to you for he taking! Please help yourself to your fill!!Your satisfaction is our satisfaction!!

Anticipated Satisfaction, eh?Well ,that is Marketing for You!!

Carefully done after much brainstorming and planning ,it generates--whips up is the right expression--a storm of satisfaction feelings in the customer,consumer or client.

Makes the man/woman even at rest in the grave crane his skeletal neck and drool with salivation at the goodies promised!!

Hi Xangan friend! Good Morning to you from India!

You wish to know why I fell in love with Marketing? Ah (whisper) here it is:

Marketing is, unlike HR, an ever-growing field of full time activity with proportionate rewards!!It is a spreading chestnut tree though without the Miller of the Dee, I daresay!

This is partly because the customer/consumer/client profile is ever changing.Unless marketing also changes in tune with it so as to be able to satisfy its felt needs head on, business stands to suffer no matter the quality of the goods/service!!.

Marketing is a broad category with sales at one end where we have an interaction with the customer.But it is not the full story.

We owe it to ourselves to :

Ø generate new markets where none existed before

Ø retain the goodwill in our already conquered markets inland or abroad

Ø chalk out motivation strategies for field staff

Ø recommend incentives for selected persons and

Ø make a keen study of the techniques adopted on a day to day basis in other countries.

Of course what works best as a Marketing Strategy in Russia may not click with the Oceania customers in Hawaii, Tahiti or Nauru.Vice versa too.

But then we are ready to learn, unlearn and relearn too on an ongoing basis.Youthful spirit thus accompanies marketing all the way from the manufacturer to the purchaser.It is its middle name!!(May be it explains why we smile so much and never lose our temper!!Ha Ha!!)

We must limit our reading to marketing texts and think over the ideas presented there too.

No more time for reading poetry aloud on a tequila dawn in the courtyard, thriller fiction on lazy summer afternoons, or even the newspaper with its surfeit of political or social gossip and news.Time just enough to do Sudoku of course and may be a weekly crossword puzzle to keep our grey matter in prime condition (for this will be needed to win over the customers out there!!)

(As a result we have to depend on our beloved SOs for marital galvanizers—no harm in that !!—and our kids for tips on what kids of their age may like best, and neighbors for shop layouts and feedback on already tested marketing strategies.Like Sherlock Homes who, by compulsion, had to concentrate on crime and forensics throughout life to the exclusion of most other subjects at Cambridge University as Dr Hudson discovered!!)

The plus side of it is we can give our SO incessant surprises!!

You wish her to be a friend of Catherine Zeta Jones,eh?Easy!

Just get a write-up published in the prominent newspaper in her area with her age deliberately deducted by 10 and a little bit extra from your imagination in regard to her adolescent glamor!!Insert this phrase expressly in your write up.Downplay her critics!Play up her performance in Zorro!!Casually mention that she ought to have got at least 6 Oscars by this time if the world were logical!!

Then, two days later, please make an appointment with her Secretary to see her at her Malibu(?) home.

Be consistent in keeping a low profile and say”Madam Catherine, My whole family is ga-ga over your pictures in the telly.I thought that perhaps you could spare a few moments on some lazy Sunday afternoon for us to meet you so that I for one could also get some information for a write-up on you in the LA Times or The Washington Herald? Please take all the time you need before informing me!!I am only a journalist and gossip columnist! You must surely be having an On-Cloud-Nine time with many films!!”

What do you think her response will be? Affirmative of course!

Under this head we have:

ü Presumption Marketing

ü Replacement Sales

ü Marketing kids’ talents using other kids-mom combos

ü Body Advertisements as a marketing tool,

ü Using children/robots/animals to market toys/kitchen products, and

ü Potential customer segmentation preferences-wise and color-wise based on data mining.

ü Exploitation of specific scenes in a feature to promote goods also comes under this category.

In this blog I shall take up Presumption Marketing.

If you are interested in marketing anything –goods or services—read on please.(Neuromarketing and Ethnomarketing are stale ditch water realms now though, in a third world nation like India, we can exploit them too for retaining our bottom line and monthly turnover since the techniques used here are mostly hackneyed ones with a few exceptions!!!)

Look at the latest M/sXXY Inc’s jewelry product brochure.

Almost seems they have done a market study on what the blue-blooded premium customer –like me of course ha ha*!!—prefers(* an instance of male vanity).

I almost fall for it except for a single reason: I have no lady love here!!Ha ha!

The buff colored envelope –certainly 12 by 10—is itself attention- riveting in more ways than one!!The minutely printed text on it reads “”XXY Inc Canada Limited”

Buff color is premium,whether it is for a pretty woman’s skirt or for a man’s coat and suit(though midnight black holds the fort by exuding power and authority beyond scope of appeal!!)

On the envelope the following print appears with a carefully careless layout intention:

IMMEDIATE REPLY REQUESTED!!Rush delivery!!Open here!!

In a box printed on the envelope I see the following:

We are holding multiple prize draw entry chances on reserve in your name.

Claim all your chances to win in the final stage by replying within the next 14 days at the latest.

Total Guaranteed Chances to win: 2

Prize Value: USD One Million

Deadline: 14 days Only

Mode of Prize Payment: Official Bank Check

Authorized by (signature) Johnson Potomac

Inside is a brochure and some stationery items, probably an introductory letter.

ELEGANCE against a maroon (or is it coffee grounds, eh?) tint plain background.

Also in print in white and gauche font size 24 the following text:

”INDISPENSABLE ACCESSORIES TO MAKE YOUR LIFE MORE BEAUTIFUL”

· Exquisite Designs:

· Organic pearls

· Blue Topaz Gemstones

· Swarowski Crystals

· Natural red corals

Simply Gorgeous!!

On each page of the brochure (cant you envisage the 6 page DTP miracle now?) we have 12 items displayed in bold relief against the same chocolate backdrop,around the neckline of some equally ravishing –no kidding—female model and ranging in price from USD 40 to USD 90 !!With installment facility of course (a variation of BUY now PAY later plans).Who wouldn’t fall for this?

Apart from the gooey dreams I ,as the unexpectedly-pleased recipient of this bombshell probe, am SURE to have in the coming days , what might be the motive of this brochure?In this No-Free-Lunch world of ours who would spend some one USD merely for pleasing me per se?

So I explore the contents of the envelope with boyish curiosity!!!

Along with this certainly dazzling saccharine brochure we have the subtly and cunningly drafted letter from Mr Johnson Potomac ,the Administrator of Prize Award Commission too,hinting that a lot of money—a virtual Ali Baba’s cavern –full of fabulous treasures is waiting for yours truly.HP printed signature ,but of course claiming to be personalized in some enigmatic manner!!

It begins in an artificial sweeter tone with a sweetness rating of 2500X(2500 times sweeter than Demerara sugar):

Dear Sadaboy,

We consider you one of our most valued customers.Thank you further since you currently hold a guaranteed chance to walk away with our biggest (sic) cash prize.You might now wish to consider which payment option you would prefer for the Prize!!

“Biggest”’ I casually note in my mind, should be replaced by “largest or highest”!!The copywriter needs a tweak on his nose!!Else it is a baited hook of course!

Ever the English language man!!Beyond repair!!ha ha!!

The tone is as if all those eggs have successfully hatched out one fine morning!!That your fondest dreams are going to come true!!The assumption—or more precisely presumption—is that I have been building many castles in the air all these months during my sleep.

Which is patently not true!!I don’t believe in dreams of any kind.

“To Sadaboy”the letter begins as if I knew this gentleman throughout my life!!It goes on in the same exuberant vein,”I have some great news for you./ Should you reply to this notice to claim your place in our Final Stage Draw,there is a real possibility of you(sic) receiving a registered letter from my office in forming you that…..”

“You” should be “your”!!

The hollowness is given away by three telltale forensic clues—To, Should you reply and “there is a real possibility that..”

All these indicate that it is computer software managed lovemaking!!

The man that has signed the letter just gave the printing order to the PC for a large number of copies with the addresses of the recipients individually changed during printing!!How cheap a technique!How insincere!!

Just like that vital clue the super sleuth gave Inspector Lestrade in Silver Blaze, often called “the Curious Incident of the Dog in the Night time”.

(Curious yourself? Well here it is.the dog that was kept in the stable of the precious race horse Silver Blaze did not bark at the time the horse disappeared.Why? Because it was the keeper himself that had taken the race horse out at midnight in order to maim it!!So the police ought to have suspected him!!)

Please note that it is the combo –this invariable piggybacking of A with B-that rubs against my grain as a marketer.Why can't we offer the items as such and then once someone has bought an item inform him or her over phone if he/she is interested in a Raffles or Lottery Draw.

Ø Customers being what they are these Recession days—cynical, angry, gone ballistic, frustrated,in despair over some domestic face-off, or job loss or any other—might accept or refuse.but we must offer him a chance to decline too,rather than take for granted that he has a posh mansion and lifestyle!!

Ø He has a 34-24-35 Latin American or Scandinavian sweetheart champing at the bit to get a necklace or a jewelry item from him, her beau!!

Ø She is hankering for just these items Cleopatra- like!!

Ø These items are going to make her a society success (or him a proud hubbie merely because he gifts these to her in a velvet box)

Ø Price asked for is nothing at all to this wealthy woman (dowager?) or business tycoon and

Ø The recipient is certainly interested to get money gratis from the raffles of XXY Inc.

Ø The buyer is having no discrimination or discernment enough to ask a few searching questions about the source of the stones used,the carattage of the precious metals used, the finish(Matt/satin/brilliant) of the stones and the metals, the durability of the product across the next few years ,maintenance tips etc

In other words this is a kind of marketing that is based entirely on a presumption the Marketing Manager makes in the middle of the night during his late night shallow sleep with one of his hands cupped over the vital parts of his wife(lest it disappear by morning thereby depriving him the!! ha ha!!).

This technique has little prospect of clicking in spite of being a DM (direct marketing) approach because it presumes and assumes without verifying the customer’s mindset at all.

In fact the Customer scores a duck in this Unidirectional High Volume Cold Mail Correspondence Courtship Game!!

If your business firm chalks out a marketing strategy in which the potential customer is not included, it is doomed to bomb in the market since the customers ---irrespective of their geographical location--like a participation feeling.”I am the decision maker” ,they ought to feel and “I am the man in this picture!”

Dear friend, you must know that this technique developed as a result of side stepping the delay the typical customer takes in arriving at a purchase decision when it involved a good amount of money.

That’s why it uses a sweetener language and tone –to floor you within seconds of the brochure arriving in your hands! The color of he envelope, the micro printed logos, the see-through window with your address on the letter inside, the colorful brochure itself, the coupons for purchase of the jewelry—all these play cheerleaders or willing handmaidens to this intention,which is –to put it mildly—unethical!

And unspeakably unfair to the customer since it is like ramming down YOUR intention down his/her throat at some unwitting moment when he/she least expects it! It is also insulting also because of the presumptions you are making about him/her!!

This technique can, however, be improved and made more acceptable to the target customer of XXY in the following manner!!

1. Send the brochure first and then include a reply paid envelope along with a simple Yes or NO on a small card.

2. The letter can include all the unique, unparalleled features of every item in the brochure.

3. Don’t forget to say that your companions can never get these items from retail outlets in any city or town in India!

4. Take off on that point to pinpoint the uniqueness of the individual woman (the target customer in this case).Every woman wishes to be viewed as unique in some manner.Stress this point in the letter.

5. Mention the Installment Facility of course but emphasize the investment aspect and gift value potential of these items.

6. Lay stress on the durability of the items.Indian customers always look for this aspect first.

7. Casually mention that you are giving your respected customer the free option to take part in a Raffles Draw also in which if lucky he or she may get some lump sum or a car.Only if he/she wishes to and feels lucky in some way!!Reserved for the few!!

8. Say that if interested in the Sweepstakes part he/she has to fill in a form (enclosed) and post the Purchase Order immediately.

9. Promise to accept the jewelry item back if the customer is not satisfied in any manner whatsoever.Include a promise to that effect along with the brochure.

The customer on receiving this letter –this intro letter needs careful drafting and redrafting till it is sharp as a lance or a scalpel--will tend to place the Purchase Order since you are keeping a low profile and making him/her feel adequately self important.

Who doesn’t like an inflow of free money especially because an outflow of cash is needed for the jewelry?

If Mr Cox is coming in when Mr Box goes out it works satisfactorily for the landowner you see.So the recipient will place the Purchase Order for more than a single item inspired by the Sweepstakes entry privilege!! And hope for the best!!

In all marketing real penetrating intelligence is needed for producing results.you must know the customer inside out of course but the latter –ever on his/her guard--should never guess it in the least from you!!Vanity is what you can tap in marketing cosmetic and personal accessory items.And both men and women have vanity in bucketfuls!!

Never make presumptions while trying to market anything!Know your customer ,and befriend him through the intro letter.Give him the option to buy the item.Don’t try to sell it to him aggressively at all.

Every customer seeks to buy satisfaction of some kind.He pays for that feeling of satisfaction in anticipation by paying you for the item!!

This also applies to some extent in our personal life.

Boys and girls marry because of this anticipated satisfaction of the A to Z kind they hope to get!!

If boys and girls got married because they genuinely liked the person of the opposite sex instead of looking at all the associated plus points, fewer marriages will end up in the Sahara sands of mutual dissatisfaction after a while.Right now it is experimentation and disposal culture that is taking place in the West in this delicate area.And invariably it is the woman that ends up disappointed too.

Well, well my dear friend!!I hope you are not unsatisfied with this blog content!!

Having to Live with Sex Dreams--Bah!!

Fri, 14 Nov 2008 12:52:14 GMT

I have had to live with love dreams and never an actual experience of love simply because of (a)the tradition-bound conservative community I was born into and(b) my college teacher job which ws socially sensitive.I was afraid to express my love for a girl at home since my parents thought that it was indecent for a boy of 25 to find his own girl.And there were reponsibilities of all kinds heaped on me so that I was bound hand and foot.I loved to marry a foreigner from OUTSIDE India,but this was unheard of by my parents and relatives.I was then interested in taking a girl from another caste---a girl that liked me too -- but this was also turned down.The only place I experienced real love for love's sake was poor Ethiopia where one lady doctor girl told me to give her a kid for remembrances'sake and No other obligation at all!!The girl that finally came into my life is so self-absorbed in thinking of money that she has no interest in lovemaking at all in spite of my persuasions.Self abuse has been my only safety valve most of these years.What should I do under these circumstances?....SADABOY (id:edelweiss97a@yahoo.in)

SADABOY's Datingish

Innovative Techniques in Marketing-1

Having to Live with Sex Dreams--Bah!!